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Updated Sunday, February 22, 2009 5:29 am TWN, By Elliot Tsai, special to The China Post
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My mom is mostly Caucasian and my father is Chinese. They divorced when I was young, so my youth was spent going in between two houses. This meant going between two totally different and often opposite cultures. It gives me a unique perspective on ethnicity and culture. For instance, I get to hear a lot of what the two cultures say about each other. Some of it is nice... though I have to admit, I hear my friends and family say things about the other side that hurts my feelings and makes me angry. People seem to forget that when they are making generalizations, they are also talking about me and my family. I forgive them, of course. It just shows me the need to represent a more universal truth. A good friend of mine once told me, “There's only two kinds of people. Good and bad.” Growing up, I was told by people there was a difference. I remember my dad telling me in the car, “You know son, your skin is yellow.” I remember looking at my arm, not understanding what he was talking about. I recall the white kids telling me my dad looked weird. This seems to be a cliche with people of dual cultures, but as a child I wasn't easily accepted by either side. The ABC kids spoke Chinese and I didn't. I also looked different than them. The Caucasian kids were on a different schedule. I was forced to study long hours while many of them were out playing sports. My personality was different than theirs. More like my dad's. More Chinese. I learned early on I was different. When I grew up, I learned it had its advantages. It's the differences that make you special. The similarities make you... well, like everyone else. Culture is learned, you pick it up from the people around. It's a certain way of relating and communicating. It's not genetic. Because I was getting two sets of communication systems, it took time to sort them out in my head. Basically, I had to learn how to be Asian, how to be White and the differences between the two. People take their culture for granted. They think their way is “normal” and anyone who isn't like them is weird and wrong. I find this to be especially true for the “mainstream” ethnicities, depending on what country you are in. On the other end of the spectrum, the “minorities” can get too hung up on or too attached to their racial identity..
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