Looking out for the people of Taipei

Officials did not know Mr. Wenger's race or nationality beforehand, as he had submitted his application under his Chinese name, “Wen Chia-shu.”

The honorary magistrate fulfilled several of his duties by visiting Matsu this past Monday. He shook hands all around, called on dignitaries, and deftly handled questions in fluent Mandarin at a press conference of sorts at County Hall. “I hope I can be a special envoy to promote Matsu and attract more foreigners to visit,” he said.

A photo in the press showed His Honor with a snazzy sash of red and gold splashed across his chest. Fantastico!

All that publicity got me to thinking what I would like to do if I ever won a contest and wound up as the honorary Mayor of Taipei for a single, glorious day in my life. I suppose I'd try to accomplish a little of this and a little of that, you know?

I would start my day as mayor by taking small steps in situations that appear to be trivial.

I'd board a bus jammed with passengers anywhere in Taipei at, oh, about 8:30 in the morning. I'd squeeze through the aisle until I reached the “bo ai” section (“seats of kindness,” and pardon the loose translation) in the front, and study the good patrons ensconced there. I'd look to see if they were elderly, physically challenged, or pregnant. If I found passengers who did not fit the requisite qualifications, I'd tap them on the elbow. With a smile, I'd brush the lint off my HONORARY MAYOR sash, and say, “Good morning! I am the honorary mayor of Taipei today, and I just know, because you look like such a very polite person, that if you do spot anyone for whom that seat is especially reserved, you will be very, very kind.”

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